Ugh

I am so done with being sick. It really just needs to stop. I just want to enjoy break. Please, Cold Virus? Just get off my case for three weeks, that would be great.

FNAF SERIES!!!

Super excited to announce my Five Nights At Freddy's series! Go see Ryan and me play and have the biggest jumpscare ever at the end!

Bye,

Pete

Halloween Special!

New video soon! I am going to make a tribute to the horribly slow murderer with the extremely inefficient weapon!

Also, I will be making a video game tribute! Tweet suggestions for references to @empsofrandom 

! I will shoutout to any other YouTube friend who gives me your subscribes!

And also, I will send a free tshirt to some of the epic folks who subscribe! Please suggest more stuff for me to do!

I will soon upload an Epic Meal Time parody, so please watch!

New stuff!

Hi!

Who wants some new info on my upcoming projects?

• Sequel to Santa vs green teletubby
• a video on things that I hate
• let's play videos
• skate 3
• burnout paradise
• goat simulator
• xbox minecraft
• club penguin
• google images searches
• this is so that I can brush up on my comedy skills
• Q&A with me
• Send me your questions by tweeting me at @empsofrandom or using the youtube comments on one of my videos

There we go!

See y'all!

Bye!

New video in about an hour!

It's almost time for a new video!!!

Can't wait!

Bye!

NEW VIDEO!!!

Hey guys!!
So I posted the video above onto YouTube, and it is pretty funny!!!
Bye!!

Hey y'all!

I am SUPER HAPGRY RIGHT NOW!!!!

Hapgry (adj.): a state of both happiness and anger at the same time. ORIGIN: I made it up just now. Don't question me.

I just got my braces off.

PROBLEM: I now have a fixed retainer.

I'M SOOO MAD!!!!!

Bye!

Hope you enjoy my short story!!

A JOURNEY THROUGH A BIT OF FLUFF UNDER THE BED
by Pete Mitchell

“NNNNGGGGH!”

Bill grunted loudly as he rose from his favorite lounge chair to get another beer. He was 59, and his back problems were beginning to become a source of odd grunts or cracks while getting out of chairs, aside from the pain that came with spinal issues.

He stumbled from the room where he and his friends, Todd, Bob, and Dave, were watching the news and complaining about the world at large. As he opened the refrigerator, he suddenly felt a bit overwhelmed by the absurd amount of choices he was presented with.

His eyes scanned the cold, white, plastic shelves of his Kitchenaid™, which was flooded with rows and rows of cans and bottles (both metal and glass). He decided on a metal bottle of Bud Lite, as he perceived its sharp frothiness to be a healthy constituent (which is quite a silly prospect indeed, as he had no way to get any other healthy food or exercise).

By the time he got back to his massage chair, a special report was on the news. As he got a closer look at it, he saw what no human ever thought conceivable: a large, red blob of alien matter was crawling through the small countryside where his house was located.

“A giant red blob is on the loose, and is growing bigger every time it absorbs an object. Biologists say that it is an abnormally large slime mold, but a lab test shows that the sample that was collected from a barbed wire fence was not made of cells, organic matter, or anything else found on Earth,” blared the anchor. The display began to static.

Dave rolled up the thin curtain, which was clumsily slung over the window, and saw a red, blurry version of what could normally be seen as a vast field of tall grass.

The power abruptly went out, which was not a huge problem, considering the presence of a large generator. Bill ran into the boiler room to turn it on. 

Finally, a jelly-like substance fell on Bob’s head, causing him to wail, “WE’RE INSIDE THE RED BLOB!!!”

The lights began to flicker on. As Bill scurried up the stairs, Todd yelped and flailed his left arm, which was being clutched by a 20-pound octopus. It turned into a snail and flew away, as Dave violently sneezed out a tomato. A three foot long bathtub began baking a large cake in the washing machine.

It is simply out of concern over the reader having a suspense-initiated heart attack that I am informing you now that the only ills suffered by these men are the shock of a simply terrifying revelation and a giant barnacle latching on to Todd’s right shoe. No further information will be disclosed on the revelation as of this segment of the story.

And yes, that is a direct reference to Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

The furniture and other floor-dwelling objects suddenly were placed on the ceiling in a perfectly normal configuration, as the entire room was turned upside-down, with all objects remaining unaffected by gravity. All, that is, except our four friends, who found themselves standing on the new floor, which now had a cheap chandelier standing in the middle of the room, along with a few stray lights in small sockets in the bright green floor.

“This must be how a bat feels,” Dave muttered.

Beneath them, four trap doors opened up, spilling each man into a well-furnished vacuum cleaner. The vacuum shattered into hundreds of pieces, landing them on the screen of an immense iPad, each man landing on an application icon.

“FHUI GHEMN OJHK HPQ OWUR JMH KOED L LETHO RTHGU B SKPO LKEM THA GARD WRTH CH BER RY PI ZN CTHULHU NOLKUT T THCA B AR TH MAOUT GHT STH BEEFY!!!!” shouted a large mythical creature, who was sitting on a throne about two feet away from them. The surrounding environment flickered and turned into a lavishly built palace. The creature was immediately surrounded by kittens, who were dressed in Army uniforms. The creature began to make a huge show of trying to get up, and grew three blue noses, with which he began to walk towards the four men, who had found themselves inexplicably chained to the floor, and were unable to escape the strange organism approaching them.

“SHHHHHHPPPHHOHOOHOHOOHHHHHHOOOOOOOMMPH,” squished the creature, who began to loudly ooze uranium through his skin. A foot-long crustacean scampered across the marble floor and grasped Todd’s right sneaker, then contorted itself into a lump, completing its purpose as a barnacle.

The creature, in a convenient change of character, began speaking English, albeit in a completely incomprehensible fashion.

“YUO AR COHNFYOOSD. THIS ISSSS AN EVVVIDENNT FAKT! I SHALLLL ECKSPLEEN ALLLL T’INGS,” the odd beast screeched, “SUM UFFF HWICH MAYBE STARRTLINGG!”

“I AMM GOOBOOTOCLITSH, THE CRITHERIOUS LEEDUR UF TEH FJORGLDORGENS! WE ARRR AN ALIENN SSPEEECIEES FRUM THE PLANET CLUMPFLUFFUS, WHICH ES IN THE GALAXY OF UMBRELLKAKKLOOO!”

Bob and company were drenched in Goobootoclitsh’s pink spittle, which often occurs when one’s oral cavity consists of two blubbery flaps hanging over a tooth-covered hole, which is the source of two tusks to cause the flaps to have a miserable time covering up the hole.

All of a sudden, Goobootoclitsh began to liquify into a brown puddle, as did the throng of kittens, which became a large pink pool. These puddles then turned into an amoeba-like mass, and extended a long, brownish pseudopod through the wall, and promptly crawled off.

Ten million playing cards fell on the four remaining humans in the room.

The walls caved in.

All was silent.

As they dug their way out of the large pile of cards, they found themselves back in Bill’s home.

“This will certainly make it easier to play poker,” mumbled Todd.

THE END

Emperors of RANDOM: Season II Coming soon!!!

New videos this summer!!!!!
Btw, Bailey is on a brief hiatus, as are the rest of us.
We will ALL be back!!! Don't worry!

TEAM DOKU!!!!

Hey guys!!!

Do you like MINECRAFT!?!?!?!?!???

Do you like Emperors of Random!!!?!??!?!

Do you like Team Doku!!?!?!??!?!????

HOW AWESOME WOULD IT BE IF YOU GOT ALL THREE...

AT THE SAME TIME!!!!!!!!!

As you probably know, I am a member of Team Doku, and have access to their Instagram.

Recently I was playing Minecraft with DokuLightness and MrzGamerz (go check out their YouTube channels!) while using OoVoo to maintain communication.

Wanna see us play together?

OK!

I will record more Minecraft videos in the future!

BYE!!!

Hey all!!

I am just gonna start this with a little apology, because I haven't done ANYTHING recently, so just bear with me.

I have been grounded for 1 month, so that means no computer/iTouch. I did my last couple of vids at school with Mr. B or at home w/ a friend. This is coming from tech class. Don't lose hope, I am still on YouTube, and I now have a Vine account, so just hang on.

Anyways, the activity on my videos isn't stellar, either.

Good news!!!! Ryan is now part of Emperors of Random, as can be explained in the last 4 minutes of Santa vs Green Teletubby!

Thank you Ryan for being such a great sport! Sorry about how made your debut one of my worst videos, quality-wise. Maybe the funniest though. All credit for the idea goes to Ryan, as he came up with it!

Bye!

Hola!

Hey guys! I am posting from my iPod Touch I just got! I love it!!! It is 4th generation with cameras for each side!

Bye!!!

Why does nobody see this!??

         Is anyone seeing this page? I haven't publicized my YouTube channel any more than I have with my Twitter feed or my Google+ pages. Who has even seen these links! Where are the people! I like to get feedback! Where is DokuLightness? Where is everyone?
         Why was that one week a powerhouse of views and subscribers? I am sorry about the lack of videos, I have not had any time! I tried to post a Minecraft video, but it never loaded!
Bye!

Hello to all!

I have a Twitter account already! Check us out here (search @empsofrandom)! Hopefully my iPod touch 4th generation will come this week, because I will be getting Vine, Instagram, Facebook, and other ways for you guys to see our humor! Please check us out on Twitter, I just had to post something to make everyone guilty for not paying any attention to us! LOL!

'Stache Week!

Hey everyone! We are starting a new tradition around my birthday. During the first week of March, I will buy 3 packs of 7 fake mustaches and we will post our pics of us wearing them on my Google+ and see what you think about them. Which ones are the best? Who wore it better? Why are we doing this?

All of them are questions we want you guys to answer so we can see which of us is most likely to have a 'stache when we get older! This is not to settle any disputes amongst us. This year I will be the only one wearing the 'staches, so if you want Bailey's ego to be terminated, you will have to wait another year.
Bye!

Hey! What's up!?

I cannot wait for the upcoming live stream event at my birthday party! Again, PLZ TO SUBSCRIBE 2 MY CHANNELZ! I am only blogging to keep you guys updated on what's up, but we all love entertaining you guys! I cannot wait to use this blog to interact with you guys, although it is a limited source of communication with you guys. I still think it is important to talk publicly about our work on YouTube, because I think everyone has something to add to this! We are using this blog as a database for all of the bits and pieces from behind the scenes of the videos we make. All of the stuff on this site is to give you guys a good idea of the action you don't see. I am pretty good about showing off the massive failures we have generated with our dumbness and lack of script, but I will post bloopers here. Just because.

Bye!

Quick Update!

Hey everyone! Just a quick little post to update anyone who doesn't know anything about my personal life! Here are the latest things that have happened to me on YouTube:

• YouTuber DokuLightness is now a member of the Emperors of Random team! After some interviews, a lot of debating between the original members, and some more Skype and phone calls, we finally decided to take him in! I cannot wait to work with him!
• DokuLightness, in a strange turn of events, has made me a part of his own new channel, TeamDoku, and I am now a member! I guess it has something to do with "eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth!"
• Again, my upcoming birthday party will be streamed live onto YouTube!
• Any rumors about Bailey getting fired are now false.

Bye!

And Now for something completely Different!

I am TOTALLY psyched for my next event: WE ARE GOING LIVE FOR MY BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! On Saturday, March 1, 2014, we will be doing a live stream onto YouTube at my birthday party! Again, check out my channel, because it will be the epicenter of this live earthquake of epicness!!! Please tune in to the event anytime from 3:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. and have fun with us!